Miss Luxxy
Lisa Sorrentino
I
Miss Luxxy drove her Jag into town,
Got out of her car and put her feet to the ground.
As she stood up, she announced to no one in sight,
"I'll be Mr. Luxxy tomorrow, but I'm Miss Luxxy tonight."
So Miss Luxxy straightened her black fishnet hose
Then pulled out her compact to powder her nose.
The reflection she saw was a glorious sight,
Eye shadow that sparkled and glowed in the light.
And her ruby red lips pointed to the heavens above
Applied with care, anticipation and love
Miss Luxxy's wig would have put Dolly's to shame,
Teased and coif fed in a platinum mane.
With a sigh of perfection, she snapped the compact shut,
Replaced it in the leopard bag that hung her butt.
She made her way to the bar in her stiletto shoes,
Her dress, sequined magenta of various hues.
Miss Luxxy felt good all tucked, taped and tight,
Knowing that someone might get lucky tonight.
II
Miss Luxxy smiled as she hiked up her dress,
Sucked in her stomach and threw out her chest.
She opened the door with a masculine push,
And entered the bar with a feminine swoosh.
Miss Luxxy sat down at the bar without any trouble,
And ordered a scotch, "But make that a double."
She threw back her drink and put down her money,
Then asked the bartender, "Do you have a jukebox, honey?"
At the jukebox she looked over the selections at hand,
"Lola" by the Kinks—her favorite band.
She moved her body to the music's "sensuous" beat
Until her eyes locked with a man in the next seat.
III
Billy Bob said to Bubba, "Do you see what I see,
Is she really a he or is he really a she?"
And Bubba didn't know, and Bubba didn't care,
All he saw was that dress, the makeup and hair.
So Bubba slipped off his seat, thought he might take a chance,
Introduced himself to Miss Luxxy and asked her to dance.
As Bubba danced closer he whispered in her ear,
"Hey pretty lady, let's get ourselves out of here."
IV
Now this story ends in an unusual way,
For Bubba became Barbara the very next day.
And here's something you really must know,
They'll both be appearing on Oprah's next show.
|
